8/6/2015 It's never easy to stay firm when all you really want is a Sonic shake.

My best friend came in town today and thankfully she's all about eating right, or we would be out to lunch and shakes after 8. It has made it a little easier to make good choices when I'd really like to just throw it all to the wind.

Since I am posting this 5 days after the fact, I'll keep it short. Calories for the day - 1516.

I changed my status from "light" activity to "active"

I've been working a part-time job for the last couple of months and it's great to have something to get me out of the house and keep me busy. I don't particularly like a job that I am tied to every day, and this one gives me the flexibility to work on my own time. It gives me an excuse to get up and get my exercise done in a timely manner and put on real clothes instead of pajamas. However, it also gives me the luxury of working at home in my pj's if I want to:) Having a job also keeps me out of the kitchen and the temptations of snacking, and I feel I can list my status as "active" on My Fitness Pal.

My job keeps me "active" at least 1/2 the time, but it also forces my to be quicker on my chores and keeping up with the house work.

I want to be an example of healthy living all around, eating right and pursuing a lifestyle away from the couch and the computer. Now I just need to pull my children along with me.

August 4, 2015 Time Makes All the Difference

I've noticed that I am always in a hurry. I'm in a hurry driving, I'm impatient in line at the grocery store, and I'm a fast eater. I don't know if it stems back to early morning seminary days when I would sleep in as long as possible, then jump out of bed, get dressed, eat a rushed breakfast, and head to seminary.

Children came along and it seemed that if I wanted to eat, I'd better hurry up and get it done. Now days, I am just in the habit of inhaling my food instead of enjoying it. I can be the last one to the table and still be finished before everyone is half-way through their meal. Not good. My daughter Kimber eats at a snails pace and is full before she finishes. I want to be like Kimber. I have tried eating slow and the whole time I just feel this pent up anxiety telling me to hurry up.

Part of changing my habits has got to be more mindful eating, as well as slower eating so my body can recognize when it is full. I think I need a visual reminder - like a stop watch or countdown timer. Then I need to plan twenty minutes for a meal instead of five.

My eating today went well until about 10:30 at night when Megan pulled out the caramel corn puffs. Dang it - they are my weakness and 10:30 pm I am really vulnerable. Go to bed I told myself, you don't want that I told myself, and then I ate some.

It's after midnight, but I'm doing this anyway.

It's all about consistency right?  That's about all I've got left right now. I exercised today, added in some interval training, and ate right. The thing that is really killing me right now is lack of sleep.

So, with that said, I'm off to bed.

Humility, part of step 1

In trying to understand humility I turned at once - to the internet. Wikipedia did have some great insight, but so did the scriptures. When thinking about humility I thought that we were basically to think of ourselves as less than the dust of the earth. To me that seems demeaning, but what it really comes down to is appreciating our talents and who we are, but recognizing that no matter what we make of ourselves, we still have infinitely far to go and it is only through being submissive to the will of God that we can get there.  Two words that I will think of now when I think of humility are submissive and grateful. When we recognize daily our blessings and turn our will to the Father, then real changes can begin happening in our lives.

C.S. Lewis writes, in Mere Christianity, that pride is the "anti-God" state, the position in which the ego and the self is directly opposed to God: "Unchastity, anger, greed, drunkenness, and all that, are mere fleabites in comparison: it was through Pride that the devil became the devil: Pride leads to every other vice: it is the complete anti-God state of mind."[11] In contrast, Lewis states that, in Christian moral teaching, the opposite of pride is humility and, in his famous phrase, "Humility is not thinking less of yourself, but thinking of yourself less."

I love that last quote, "Humility is not thinking less of yourself, but thinking of yourself less." Awesome. Alma says: “Because ye are compelled to be humble blessed are ye; for a man sometimes, if he is compelled to be humble, seeketh repentance; and now surely, whosoever repenteth shall find mercy; and he that findeth mercy and endureth to the end the same shall be saved” (Alma 32:13).

I am compelled to be humble. I wish I had chosen to be humble all on my own, but here I am. This first week has been a really good week. I have acknowledged weakness, resisted temptation, and started to make positive changes in my life. I cannot make this change on my own, and appreciate the help from the Lord. There have been scriptures in my reading this week that have been really helpful and positive influences all around me.

I weighed in at 178 this morning. Down 4 lbs.

Menu:
Roast, potatoes, carrots, gravy, roll, jello, salad

It is fast Sunday, and my goal is to not eat all of my daily calories in one meal. I have to recognize that binge eating is not healthy and each meal much be made of good choices.

Crushed it!

Well, my plan was to get up early and exercise, but that didn't happen. I did get up and have a great breakfast and then I hit the yard. Three hours of vigorous weed pulling and digging with sweat running down my face and back - I felt like I worked out. I'm also feeling the soreness at the end of the day. I did try to figure how many calories you burn when you pull weeds, shovel, and do yard work. I figured about 300/hr. Not a lot, but three hours worth is pretty great.

I did stay well within my calorie count and am looking forward to fast Sunday. When my focus is not on food, I can really concentrate on other things. The most difficult thing will be going from fasting to road trip - I often get tired when I don't eat. Scott said he's come along for company.

Food for today:
B:  1 cinnamon raisin bagel, fried eggs, strawberries
L:  Ham pita with veggies, grapes
D: 1/2 hamburger, tater tots, watermellon

I said "no" to the orange julius I made for dinner, the free creamies at Sam's club, and the popcorn during the movie.  Yea me for abstaining and making great choices.

Nothing good happens after 10

The nights I go to bed on time, at a reasonable hour, I am successful. The nights I stay up late watching a movie - not so much.

I did great all day and blew it in the home stretch. It's just something I really need to be aware of and put my calories in My Fitness Pal before I eat it and not after.

Heading into the weekend, I want to be successful. I plan to get up at 7 am, go to the gym, shower and breakfast, then off to garage sales.

I've been sore for several days from the lunges and squats I did on Wednesday, but that should be easing up by tomorrow so I can do it all again.

I told my brother Rich today that taking a picture a day and waiting to see changes in my body is like watching a flower grow - it takes forever, but in the end I hope to become who I want to be on the outside as well as the inside. This journey is about making changes physically, mentally, and spiritually - a day at a time.  Today I read in Alma 7:  "And now I would that ye should be humble, and be submissive and gently; easy to be entreated; full of patience and long-suffering; being temperate in all things; being diligent in keeping the commandments of God at all times; asking for whatsoever things ye stand in need, bot spiritual and temporal; always returning things unto God for whatsoever things ye do receive." I felt like the verse was really teaching me and directing me to not give up and continue the course.

My food today:
B: Fried egg, 1/2 bagel, tomato, strawberries
L: banana, salad with chili, chicken, sour cream, cheese, and guacamole
D: salad, spaghetti, and grapes
S: popcorn, 3 semi-sweet chocolate chips, and 1/2 bagel
Calories overage:  198